TLDR

• Shift viewing advice as binary (good or bad) to probabilistically achieving your desired result

• 3 advice pre-conditions of 1) emotional readiness 2) thorough contextual understanding 3) assessing current chance of desired result

• 4 advice conditions of 1) messenger 2) message 3) space-time 4) probability of desired result chances

• 2 advice post-conditions of 1) interpretation 2) aligned action as a % of advice

example statements

• “I keep getting bad advice from people.”

• “Can someone — anyone — please help me?”

• “There’s all this information out there on what to do (to lose weight / to find a job, to be happy, etc.), but what do I actually do?”

DEFINING ADVICE

Let’s first get on the same page of what “advice” actually is. My definition of advice is any information that we can act on that will increase the expected value of our desired result.

What does “expected value of our desired result” mean? I believe that life is a long game of probabilities. And in probabilistic situations, the higher the expected value, the more likely it is we would take that action.

Here’s a look at my equation

• Desired result = Probability*Space Freedom Value + Probability*Time Freedom Value + Probability*Energy Freedom Value + Probability*Money Freedom Value

For a full deep dive into that, read the Life Expected Value newsletter.

The question is what we’re optimizing for. That’s what the previous newsletter addressed in terms of Desires, pictured as the Desire Tree. This is assuming you have a desire already in mind and need assistance to achieve that desire.

So to help rephrase my definition of advice, it’s anything that can help increase the chances of us reaching our desires. And advice from others can be a great way to increase those chances of us accomplishing our goals.

With that definition established, let’s deconstruct the other aspects of advice.

Quick side note: Going forward, I’m going to refer to the person sharing any advice as the advisor and the person receiving the advice as the advisee.

ADVICE PRE-CONDITIONS

Before there is any actual advice shared, I believe there are at least 3 pre-conditions to make any advice more optimal.

• The advisee is emotionally ready to receive the advice

• The advisor understands the advisee’s context

• Both parties understand the current chance of success

I don’t know about you but I’ve been in situations where either I wasn’t in the right headspace to receive advice from someone or I shared advice when all they were looking for was emotional support and validation. It’s not a fun feeling. On either side. You can avoid lots of ‘unsolicited advice’ situations by recognizing this first pre-condition to advice.

To ensure that the person is actually ready to receive advice, you can ask them a question like “do you want some ideas to improve the situation?” That way, they have the option of saying no and you have a better idea of how to support them.

Now if the advisee comes to you first saying they’re seeking advice and guidance, then they’re theoretically providing that emotional readiness proactively, so you’re good to continue. *Each situation is different so approach each with care.

So that’s the first pre-condition.

The next pre-condition is that the advisor understands the advisee’s context. This is an open-ended pre-condition with it spearheaded by the simple question of “Why?” What is the desired result of the advisee? This comes back to the definition we established above. If they don’t actually know what result they’re looking for, that’s completely valid, but it just requires a different approach.

If they have an idea but it’s not fully developed, your role as the advisor is to place yourself in a journalist’s shoes. Ask questions that allow them to elaborate on the desire. You want all the context you can get. What put them in that position? What are they looking for? When are they looking for that desired result? What have they tried in the past? How has their mindset been throughout those previous attempts? Who else have they asked?

Just as a journalist would do, get all the context you can as if you’re about to write a story on this, describing all the angles of something. It seems like a lot of work, but it actually makes your job as the advisor easier because you can advise something that much more potent and contextual.

The third pre-condition, which is related to the above, is to make a note of what the advisee feels are the chances of their desired result if they don’t take and act on any advice.

This establishes a baseline for where they’re at. Do they think they have a 20% chance or 80% chance of reaching their target without your input?

“I’m really lost right now. My desired result is to find a job I like. I think if I continue with what I know without any help from anyone, my chances of getting that job are 10%.”

Something like that is very helpful to get everyone on the same page. It also makes evident how important the potential advice could be. You can’t see the change in before and after of chances if you don’t establish a before. That’s the purpose of this.

Now this may seem unnecessary, impractical, and unmeasurable, and therefore irrelevant. But if you look at virtually every piece of advice, the chances of success are assumed — usually very high. All I’m doing is just making explicit what is implicit.

Okay, now the advisee is emotionally ready for advice, you have as much context as you need, and the baseline desired result chances have been established. Now what? Now comes the actual advice. Let’s break that down as well.

There are 4 aspects to the actual advice itself.

• Messenger

• Message

• Space-Time

• Probability of desired result expected value