We have 1 on 1 meetings with our managers or others all the time but how often do we have 1 on 1 meetings for ourselves? Time that brings us closer to ourselves. To connect deeply with ourselves. We’re afraid to spend that 1 on 1 time because society has taught us to not be okay with being on our own. Society equates being alone to being lonely. Lonely is a feeling. Alone is simply an inanimate adjective. People have discomfort with being alone but personal transformation happens in those moments of being alone.
In Becoming, after their honeymoon, Barack went on a solo retreat to Bali to finish the manuscript to his for book. That’s how he could focus to pull forth the best version of himself.
In being with a potential partner, they may not understand all the reasons why being alone can be so productive and beneficial for me. So I’ll have to set expectations up front that being alone doesn’t mean I don’t want to give to them. Actually the opposite. I’m filling up my cup so I can give more to them. However, being in a partnership with someone means probably you are less alone but it doesn’t mean you are less lonely. Being there for each other when the other is lonely and giving space for when they want to be alone. Because they / I may be their full and best selves only after some time spent alone. In essence, lonely and alone are opposite. Lonely, you want someone to be there with you. Alone, you don’t want anyone there with you. Or at least the latter is the connotation that I want to now think of alone as.
So this 1 on 1 meeting with ourselves is the most important 1 on 1 we’ll have. Make sure it’s a daily one. Schedule it in so it’s a non-negotiable. OH! View it like this! One you in this 1 on 1 is the current you. The other you is the future, best version of you. By checking in with the best you, you dissociate from the current you while simultaneously checking in with your highest self. So then why wouldn’t you go to that meeting?! Don’t skip the meeting with your best self because who knows what wisdom and insight and perspective they’ll provide to get you to that version of you. That’s the real 1 on 1 meeting!
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