Continuing the catching up with Indistractable questions. What's one incident when mental abstinence backfired? When it left me further away from what I really wanted. Lol literally yesterday. I was coming back from Freedom Park after a perfect morning of doing yoga, meditation, Tai Chi, and recording some podcast episodes when I had the urge to eat out. I initially looked up some places while I was still at the park. The choices looked good, but I eventually closed the tabs on my phone. Then when I got to my car and started driving and running an errand, I impulsively got on the phone and placed a takeout order for some French toast. It was absolutely delicious. But it was my mind saying one thing and my body telling me another. The thing is the first wave of abstinence worked when I was at the park. Why did I then later call them when I was in the car? I think I've trained my mind and now it's become a habit expressed by the body, to trying new food places when I'm in my car. I think it was first started when I got my car in Austin, I always liked trying new places. And especially so when I was in parts of the city that I don't frequently visit. So internally I'd justify going to the restaurant by saying "Oh I'm not usually around here, might as well try something new since I am here." That then perpetuated when in Atlanta, and then now in Charlotte. That sense of freedom I have when I'm in my car automatically triggers that habitual unconscious physical and mental response. Joe Dispenza says that "A habit is when the body becomes the mind." And I think that's what happened here. Being in my car triggers that response of wanting to eat out at a new place, especially if I'm hungry and especially if I'm in an infrequently visited area.
So what can I do to start turning the tide the other way? I could keep some food in my car at all times so if there's any hunger, I just need to eat that Clif bar or whatever. Most of the time since I'd know the way home, I don't need to put it into Google Maps. But maybe I can insert my apartment address even if it's a short 5 min drive that I obviously know the way back from so that I've ended up back at my house "somehow." If we go deeper back into my childhood, I've viewed eating out as a reward or as somewhat of a celebratory event. I'd have to bring and eat home lunch 4 days of the week at school and then the other day I'd probably eat something at school, like chicken nuggets or something. That incentive was placed in my memory at an early age and reinforced countless times. Now it feels like any time I do something productive or beneficial for myself, I almost need to reward myself by eating out. This was the result I was trained for, so not a surprise it's happening and manifesting itself like this in my adulthood. So how then to rewire the my brain cells to create and repeat the neural pathway that has a neutral feeling to eating out? I don't want a negative reaction to eating out because then it may swing me the other way and I'd say no to hanging with friends if we went out to eat. Trigger is "I'm hungry" → desired outcome is "let me grab a snack from home first and then see if I still feel like eating out." Trigger is "I'm in my car in a new place of town." → desired outcome is "Is there a park or library or Barnes and Noble that I haven't been to in this area that I can go to?" Or "Let me put in my home address and follow the map." Or lol what about this. I can see how long it'll take to get home, so then I can text or Slack myself "I'll be home in X min" so that I follow my word since I've committed to telling 'someone' that. If I really wanted I could even text that to another person to really hold myself accountable. Ok, lots of solutions here, just a matter of implementing one / them now.
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